Lessons in Patience

     As a parent, I find myself telling my children to have patience a lot.  In fact, my greatest frustration as a father is the fact that it seems sometimes that I’m not allowed to do any activity for more than five minutes without receiving a request for assistance with something else.  

      “Will you help me snap my pants?”

     “Will you get me something to drink?”

     “Will you put my favorite show on for me?”

     Now these are not unreasonable requests, nor are they particularly difficult or time consuming.  They are simple things that a 3 and 5 year old just can’t do on their own most of the time.  The only reason they are even a minor inconvenience is that they are generally delivered when I’m elbows deep in dirty dishes, taking out the trash, preparing a meal, or some other activity that I would have to drop in the middle to fulfill my little one’s request.  Therefore the most common response is, “I would be happy to get that for you just as soon as I’m done with what I’m doing.”

     Now I would imagine, from a child’s perspective, it can get pretty easy to get frustrated with that wait.  “I just asked for him to snap my pants, it would take two seconds, why do I have to stand around.  Is the garbage more important than me? Why is it taking so long?” 

     I have the right to set my priorities and decide what is more pressing at the moment.  I know that waiting is a part of life and the best way to develop patience is to practice it.  I also know that a little planning, practice, and growth will enable my children to do these things on their own, so until then, they will have to wait until it suits the priorities of the one upon whom they are reliant for help.

     Which hopefully  puts my own life a little bit more into perspective.  Yes, God, my Heavenly Father, could do the things that I ask easily in moments…but have I stopped before I asked for something to see what He is doing and know if He has something more important going on between us right now?  Is He trying to teach me patience? Is it something that with a little planning, growth, and practice I could get for myself so I wouldn’t have to wait? Is what seems to be an extremely long wait, a reasonable and brief time to God?

To Do What Father Does

     I’m a little ashamed to have to admit that one of the most flattering acknowledgements I could ever receive as a testament to my children’s love for me annoys me more often than not.  When I am home, whatever I am doing, that is what my kids want to be doing.  They have toys, games, movies, puzzles, video games, and books enough to fill endless hours of play.  All of that means nothing when compared to spending time with Daddy.

      When I come through the door after a day at work, they call my name and run to me with open arms.  They jostle one another to be as near to me as they can.  They press against me until they almost knock me over.  I pull them off of me long enough to get my shoes and coat off and go back to the bathroom and they wait at the door for me to come out.  I settle into the recliner to relax for a few minutes and they crowd onto a lap for which they are rapidly growing too large.  If I go to watch TV, they want to watch what I am watching.  If I go to play a game, they want to play.  If I read a book, they want me to read to them. 

     Recently, I have felt like God has been challenging me to see in my children an example of the kind of relationship He wants to have with us.  He longs for us to run to him with arms flung wide and call him “Daddy.”  He wants for us to want to be with him so much that we are willing to push aside anything that tries to come between us.  He wants us to follow him to his private place.  He wants us to crawl up into His lap and see what He is doing so that we can copy Him because we want nothing more than to be like Him. 

     I also see the other side of it.  What kind of example are they seeing from me?  Are they seeing me pray?  Are they seeing me read my Bible?  Are they seeing me act toward others in love?  Do they see me sharing what I have with those that don’t have as much?  Do they see me working hard so that I glorify God and contribute to society, His other children?

Listen

My son gets in trouble numerous times a day because he doesn’t listen. “Don’t push your sister,” barely gets out of my mouth and over she goes. “We can’t play with that right now, please go put it back” goes unheard as he continues to open the puzzle box and scatter the pieces around the floor. Most of the time, it’s not that he’s ignoring me…I’ve seen the look of complete mystification on his face when after the third time of, “come here please” (usually said near a shout) he gets in trouble and has absolutely no idea why. Like most of us, he is simply so involved in what he wants and what he is doing – he’s oblivious to the voice of his father trying to guide him out of trouble.

How often in a day to I get in trouble because I don’t listen to my Father’s voice? How often does He try to instruct me in the way I should go, but I continue on my way oblivious because I’m too busy pursuing what I want to hear what He has to say?

Wrestle With Me

My children’s favorite activity is to wrestle with me. They will drop any toy they own and come running from any corner of the house at the hint of an opportunity to do so.  I only have shadowy memories of playing and wrestling with my own father when I was little, but perhaps it speaks to just how powerful those memories are that they are some of the few memories I have from as early as one or two years of age.   

 

What is it about wrestling that conveys such a powerful emotion? 

 

The body to body touch conveys a level of intimacy that a child can understand in spite of any other barriers there might be. Physical touch has a power that suffers no language barrier. Second, there is a powerful conveyance of reassurance that comes from knowing that your father is immeasurably stronger than you are.  I can easily immobilize my three and five year old with a fraction of my strength.  I can throw them in the air and catch them.  I can let them try to run away and catch them again before they get more than a few steps.  No matter how hard they struggle, they can feel that I am in charge – and that leaves them free to just be children.  It is those strong arms that will shelter them when they are scared.  It is that gentle spirit that despite being capable of doing them injury chooses to grapple with them just hard enough to let them build and test their own strength. 

 

How often do we ‘wrestle’ with our Heavenly Father?  How often do we come running to feel His power around us and know the true strength of Him that watches over us?  How often do we test our muscles against His and find ourselves gloriously short?